“There are people there to help & make it a little easier”

My husband was diagnosed with vascular dementia two years ago. I felt shocked but not surprised, as I had noticed that over the previous two or three years he was having difficulty finding words and following what people were saying. The Consultant was kind and said, ‘I know it’s hard to hear’. She gave me a folder with lots of information that stopped me from feeling so alone and offered me a way to find help.

One leaflet had details about the Dementia Navigator Service with Belfast Trust. I called the contact number, got a quick reply, and Rebecca was wonderful. From then on, the door opened to all kinds of support in East Belfast and beyond, and activities for me and other carers.

My first step was to take the Alzheimer Society Carer Information and Support Programme (CrISP)  programme. I met other carers, it felt safe and confidential, and people were honest. The information has stayed with me, from what it’s like to see the world from the point of view of the person with dementia, to financial advice and lists of all the activities that are open to carers. I was also linked with a ‘dementia buddy’, who has become a dear friend of mine. I found out that there are walks, yoga, tai chi, craft making, coffee mornings and singing, amongst many other activities that are listed in the monthly Dementia Friendly East Belfast ‘What’s On Guide’ run by Dementia Friendly East Belfast.

Best of all, for me, has been the Carers’ Café held monthly in the Library at Holywood Arches. This is an easy, open gathering of people in the same position, who are looking after someone with dementia. It is so good to hear about other people’s experiences: the good, the massive challenges and exhaustion that can go with caring, along with the positive and sometimes funnier moments.  There is no pressure to talk, and tea and coffee and buns make you feel looked after.

I can honestly say that all this has kept me going.  The diagnosis of dementia in a loved one is devastating, but there are people and organisations there to help, and that make it just a little easier.